I really was studying, until my mind ran off again :)

It is far past my bed time...and while I was up studying and taking practice tests, I turned on some pandora into my headphones and off my little mind ran. Somewhere between reading about how all service based purchases (personal training in this case) are emotionally driven, and hearing the lyrics "even on my weakest days I get a little bit stronger"; it dawned on me that strength comes from emotion, and even better we control our emotions therefore we control our own strength?!?! I know it seems simple enough right? I mean you are your own destiny and I lecture and write constantly about how you make your journey your own decision every day, but it is something about the intensity in the way it hit me tonight....

My handy dandy Pandora played me quite a few long lost country and pop hits that were all so familiar to the streaming of mental photographs and memories that played through my adolescent and teen years. Memories that a lot of times I try not to rehash and some that I use to thrive on, to push myself. The point is I never in a million years would have thought the girl I was then would have turned into the woman I am today. Do NOT under any circumstances think that I am tooting my own horn here, I have many goals left to accomplish and plenty of room for growth, knowledge, and improvement. BUT my proof that I can do it is my past to my present. NOT just in weight loss, NOT just in physicality. While I am still very sensitive at heart and tend to be overly emotional I have learned to be tough without being hard; be caring without being a door mat, and most importantly be somebody I can look at in the mirror and accept. Stretch marks, scars from the past, good memories, bad decisions, all of it wrapped into a package of a grown woman who is choosing her own fate and destination (of course with Christ by my side as my guide)

One very amazing example is something that I was blessed enough to experience a few weeks ago, as I started this journey almost three years ago, I started by doing DVDs while my newborn napped. Billy Blanks and his daughter Shellie were by far my biggest influence. I kicked, punched and chanted along with countless videos and have spent many hours with those two playing in my living room as i would sweat and cry and curse and laugh all the while testing my strength and endurance. I was blessed enough to meet these two individuals who changed my life and got to train with them while I was in TN, here are a few pictures from my training sessions.

I can promise you before all of this began Amanda Ashley Guidry-Rivera did NOT swear unless it was in a tanning bed or outside sunbathing. Now I do not feel accomplished until I have had a good sweat. I never wore sneakers unless they looked cute with my hoodie or new VS sweats, high heels were how I walked best, now I own one pair of heels and can barely walk in them, yet own countless pairs of sneakers for different training. Once upon a time I never grocery shopped without make up on, now that stuff is reserved for special occasions. Have I lost my mind? Am I less of a lady or a girly girl? No, I am just comfortable with ME, Amanda. I took control of my emotions, who cares if I don't look perfect, who cares what I wear to grocery shop or who thinks what of me, I am strong because I wake up every day and I choose to be. So ladies "Fight the good Fight"- 1 Timothy 6:13 Fight for YOU whoever it is that you are, be that! Be comfortable in your own skin do what makes you happy and healthy! God bless until next time- Amanda